Saturday, May 31, 2008

If they IM'ed

The Big B and Shobha De have been feuding over De's comments about Ash.

So what would happen if they IM'ed to sort the whole thing out?


big_bee has logged on

diva_de has logged on


diva_de:
Hey Amit .. what are you doing up so late? also lol@ ur im handle
big_bee: I'm updating my blog ...... and big_b was taken by some1 already *frowns*.....
diva_de: lmao!! Get a life ...
big_bee: Y u hatin on me in ur columns woman?
diva_de: u started it by callin me names in your blog

big_bee: no..... u started it by talkin badly bout ash in ur column
diva_de: who else do i talk bout? no body gives a rat's ass bout what Mallika is wearin...
diva_de: tey just care wen she ain't wearin neting
big_bee: haha!! true tat ..... *ahem*
big_bee: even then .... u shudn't be dissin my family .. i released ur book for cryin out loud ...
diva_de: see that's why!! if i criticize you, it lends me more credibility ...
diva_de: ..cause ppl think we're friends n all
diva_de: so more credibility = more sales
diva_de: more sales = more money .. and mama needs more money cause mama needs her vodka .. :P ...
diva_de: ..also i need to stay in the news ... the book hasn't been selling tat well :'(
big_bee: of course it wudn't ... it's utter crap
diva_de: yeah .. but ppl don't knw tat .. until they buy it ....
diva_de: and if chetan bhagat can become a best selling author .. than so can i
big_bee: i still think u could've picked on some1 else ...
diva_de: really? as a favour to you i spared ur wife ......

diva_de: ...even thou she was looking like a female leprechaun in that green dress
big_bee: i knw!! *rolls eyes* tat's the last time i let amar singh buy a dress for her ...
diva_de: lol!! y does amar singh go everywhere with you? how can u tolerate tat guy???
big_bee: i just can't get rid of the guy .....
big_bee: he must be sleeping rite now otherwise he wud've been even logged on to tis chat ....
diva_de: lol!! he's a bigger leach than me .... :P
diva_de:
how come u suddenly started to make fun of everyone on ur blog?
big_bee: i've been watchin a lot of ally mcbeal and i've come to realize that i shudn't bottle up my emotions
diva_de: really??? how profound!! u watchin lotsa tv tese days? didja see srk's panchvi pass?
big_bee: no way...... jaya told me tat show has reached previously unsurpassed levels of crap ..
big_bee: .. she says it's even more suckier than RGV ki aag ...
big_bee: .. and jaya's the only one in the family who actually likes shahrukh .... lol
diva_de: i knw .... but it was funny the way u put up ppt slides on ur blog to prove tat the srk's show has tanked big time
big_bee: hehe .. i knw .. i wanted to really give it to that smug $#@!^%#^
diva_de: hehehe!! i knw .. he's so smug isn't he .... i hate him too ...
big_bee: really? what did he ever do to you?
diva_de: i asked him to release my book but he refused .....
big_bee: which book???
diva_de: the one you released .......
big_bee: WHAT??? I WAS UR SECOND CHOICE ???
diva_de: of course not ......
big_bee: whew!!
diva_de: u were my third choice ...... my second choice was shatrugan sinha ...
diva_de: i only came to you wen both of them turned the gig down .....
big_bee: @!^#$^@#&$#$@%&@

big_bee has logged off

diva_de: amit .......
diva_de: u tere .......?
diva_de: .. hmph ...

diva_de is searching google for "cheap+botox+clinic"

8 comments:

Firefoxcub said...

I made the mistake early in life of reading one of Shobaa De's novels. I think it was called 'Sisters'- a lesbian horror thriller type about an obsessive room mate who falls in love with a wanna be actress and starts to control her life. It fucking sucked. I understand it's pulp fiction but even by those standards it was bad and that book is a prime example of how Indian authors struggle to write about sex in a sexy way. Sex in Indian books is much like sex in Bollywood movies: muted at best and fumbling inexperience at worst.

So what did she say about Ash and why? How could she insult our very own Goddess of Beauty? (I'm not an Ash fan. But she is pretty.)

Moo said...

HAHAHAHAHAHA @ Arjun Singh and the dress bit.

Everything seems to be getting the big_bee's goat these days. Why the fuck doesn't the old hag just retire and sit at home, nursing his 3487239472 diseases? Asswipe.

Teehee...Good post though. And what does one do to get Shobhaaaaaa De to SHUT UP?

Over Rated said...

ffc: .. Wow... U actually read a Shobha De book? Hehehe ... Ms. De tries to be the Indian Harold Robbins, but sadly she ends up as the literary version of Govinda!!

What she said about Ash was something that the dress she wore on the red carpet was not ironed or somethin .. .... Ms. De is our very own queen-of-stuff-no-one-gives-a-crap-about

moo: Seriously. The guy should sit home and nurse himself. However, until people keep paying him crores, I think he ain't gonna quit!! And now the whole family comes in a package with extra Amar Singh charges.

And scintists have been working for the past 60 years trying to find an anecdote to get Shibha De to stfu but have been unsuccessful. As long as people keep paying her thousands (!), she ain't gonna quit!! :P

Anonymous said...

Hi buddy,

This is first time i am reading your blog... got link from greatbongs blog

this post is really funny...quite unlike the great bong who have become the scared cow of bol sphere now... go on buddy...

chandni said...

ok I am missing something here. What exactly did she say abt Ash??

dodo said...

hilarious:)

The soap opera of that angry old man....

Over Rated said...

anon: Thank you!! Welcome ...

chandni: What she said about Ash was something that the dress she wore on the red carpet was not ironed or somethin ...

dodo: thanks ... yes, this angry old man is turning his life into a soap opera ....

Nutee's said...

Dude this stuff wass hilarious too .. i think i have become a fan ( and lemme tell u its only the secound post i've read )

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