The Real Countries of South Asia

South Asia has turned into a really, really bad Bravo reality show. [Wikipedia]

Pakistan is like a bad imitation of Sigourney Weaver's character from the Alien franchise. Although, it's doesn't have the balls like Ellen Ripley to kill itself and the alien queen it's carrying in it's womb. [WaPost] Also, Alien vs Predator is a perfect moniker for Pakistan's "war" with the Taliban.

Someone put some industrial strength drugs into Nepal's drink and now it's woken up with a really bad hangover. [NYT]

Sri Lanka is in a really bad mixed marriage and has set a new bar for domestic abuse. [InEXP]

Which in turn is causing J Jayalalitha to go more crazy. [Asian Tribune] (Okay. I'm not saying that Jayalalitha is big enough to be her own country, but you do need a passport to meet her).

Bangladesh had pre-pubescent sex. Possibly with Michael Jackson.  [Mon&Critics]

China was in a really bad place and sipped it's own lead infested milk. And then it had some Mexican food. Now it's feet are bloated, it's eyes are shut and it's hiding in a corner in the attic worried that it might get Swine Flu. Although, eating the household rat was not a step in the right direction. [TIME]

As for Bhutan, don't just stand there, DO SOMETHING CRAZY. [BusStandard]