Thursday, May 28, 2009

Dude, where's my government?

Taking a break from swearing at each other, the Congress and it's allies finally decided to swear with each other. Finally, Karunanidhi was able to satisfy all his forty wives and give ministries to hundreds of his own children. Farooq Abdullah doesn't have to sulk and hit on women in foreign countries anymore and Agatha Sangma is  joining a government of a party her father literally loathes.

So besides having thousands of ministers, another hallmark of this government, as per the Congress talking heads, is that it's younger than the previous one. Clearly, nothing says "young" than a council of ministers with an average age of 62. Thanks, Grandpa.

So everyone has been wondering where exactly is their government at? I mean didn't we just vote for one over a whole excruciatingly painful month? So what came of such a "decisive mandate"?

This is the problem with the Congress. Before the elections, it's always like this boy who has never had sex and is asking every girl he sees for an alliance. And after the elections, it's like the boy who doesn't know what goes where and always ends up in the wrong, errr, part of town on his wedding night.

We've literally had a government in absentia even before the elections were notified. We do need a government sometimes. There is a global recession going on, something you would not believe if you see all the weddings taking place in Delhi.  Also, depending on the TV ratings, there might be a global pandemic which might kill everyone who loves them some pepperoni pizza. And in case no one noticed, with the kind of neighbours we have, who really needs enemies who want to see you drop dead?

Some might argue that most government departments are better off and more efficient without a minister, which to an extent is very true. However, we do need someone to make those policy decisions because our bureaucrats are busy sending the same files to each other over and over again because no one in the IAS has ever heard of the internet. Alternatively, having a "performer" as a minister does make a difference. Hell, even the pretence of performance is somehow good for the country. That's because, as everyone knows, in our country people appreciate symbolism more than actually doing something. If you don't believe me, ask Param Vir Akshay Kumar.

In short, this is what we can expect in the next five years. Family politics played out on national television, ministers who can't even write their own name, putting party before country, lip service instead of doing any actual work. 

What was that thing about change, again?

7 comments:

Indian John Doe said...

Oh man...everything is so f***ing hilarious about everything you write, I can't resist reading it while I am at office but I can't comment there and when I reach home I forget about the exact points in the post and dunno what to say...
kudos to your writing :D

Rakesh said...

Go OO Go!!!

I've now tired of thinking of smart comments on your so aweosmely hilarious posts...

I swear, the day I do a stand up comic act, I'm gonna plagarise this blog almost entirely (except the gay jokes of course)

Cheers!

arayans said...

no poiny in me trying to post a witty comment.
:D

arayans said...

typo in the previous comment. poiny = point.

basically, i ultimately up funny; albeit at my own expense
:O

Over Rated said...

@IJD: Thank you . . . :P . . . U shud note down your points . . . We'd love to hear what you have to say . . .

@Rakesh: Heh! You're comments are always smart! . . . p.s. We get it, you're STRAIGHT . . . . :P

@Aryan: Laughing at your own expense is the privilege of a few; it's great tat you can do that! . . . :P . . .

Mumbai 58 said...

I agree with John Doe. You tend to forget what you want to say because you are so consumed with the hilarious things you have just read. After a read here, I do believe I cannot seem to think anything. You are saving my dr bills, laughter is the best medicine right? Shouldn't you be charging?

Over Rated said...

@Mumbai 58: LOL! Usually I have t pay people to read this blog! . . . :P . . .

ShareThis