Thursday, March 5, 2009

Pakistan denies existence of the Sri Lankan Cricket team

The spokesperson for Pakistani President Asif Ali Zardari, El Harami, in a press conference today denied that there was any attack on the Sri Lankan cricket team, which was widely reported and shocked the world yesterday. "In fact", said Mr Harami, "we believe that there is no country known as Sri Lanka. It suspiciously sounds very similar to someone who would come up with a program like the Art of living. Therefore, if they do not exist, how can they have a cricket team? This clearly proves that this is an attempt by certain foreign elements who want to damage our stellar international stature. Also, in a side note, we don't believe in the art of living. Living is for wimps. We prefer dying. In fact, it's sort of a national sport. It was pioneered by the Bhutto family".

When quizzed about the growing problem of terrorism in Pakistan, Mr Harami said that "Look. President Zardari is a big follower of the policies of former US President, George W Bush. And according to the Bush doctrine, the first step in eliminating a problem is to deny it's existence. Step 2 is blaming the wrong country and Step 3 is TBD. We are just on Step 1."

When asked about Pakistan's growing reputation as a failed state, he said that "Hey, no publicity is bad publicity. We are like the Paris Hilton of countries. Instead of exporting STD's we export crazy people who want to kill a large number of innocent people who cause them no harm. We're not a flash in the pan outfit like Hamas. We got tenure on our side. We've been doing this shit for decades".

When asked to comment on the Pakistani President's statement, a representative for the Sri Lankan foreign ministry, Mr Hol Ycrapinghe said that "At this stage, who really cares about what Pakistan thinks. We were one of the the last few to pay attention, really. The only other countries left are Bangaldesh and Ghana."

9 comments:

Freaky said...

>>Hol Ycrapinghe

nice one

Rakesh said...

he he, as always awesome...

All of this is actually a conspiracy against Pakistan :( Poor them...

HP said...

muhahahaha!! Freaking awesome!!

they're going to let you die for this! :P

Jhayu said...

We're not a flash in the pan outfit like Hamas. We got tenure on our side. We've been doing this shit for decades

Priceless!


P.S. Dude! My word verif: corona

Toto's, here I come tonight.

Abhishek said...

Ohh.. I thought they will say 'What is the proof that attackers were Pakistani'

Seems things have advanced much since 26/11!!!

Mudra said...

Also, in a side note, we don't believe in the art of living. Living is for wimps. We prefer dying. In fact, it's sort of a national sport. It was pioneered by the Bhutto family.

Post more, will you? :D

Che said...

Loved the bush policy part :D
This was a brilliant piece.
Keep up the standards.

Over Rated said...

@Freaky: Thanks ....

@Rakesh: Well, their politicians are one of the most delusional set of people ....

@HP: lol ... yeah ... i guess ... :P ...

@Jhayu: So alcohol is involved? Why wasn't I told anything about it? .. Also, you're almost smiling in the new profile pic. How can you let yourself go like that? =p

@Abhishek: Like you would not beleive!! :P ...

@Mudra: About the Bhutto family? .. :P ...

@Che: Thanks ... Well I have been trying this new anti-depressant and I think it's working ...

Indian John Doe said...

hahahaha...lol...as usual amazing

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